Mr. Achievement - Stanley F. Bronstein - Personal Development BlogPersonal Development Blog of the Founder of the Achievement IQ Movement and Creator of the Laws of Positioning

When you realize you’ve made a mistake, make amends immediately. It’s easier to eat crow while it’s still warm. (Dan Heist)

Realize - To grasp or understand clearly. To make real; give reality to. To bring vividly to the mind.

Mistake - An error in action, calculation, opinion, or judgment caused by poor reasoning, carelessness, insufficient knowledge, etc..

Amends - Reparation or compensation for a loss, damage, or injury of any kind; recompense.

Immediately - Without lapse of time; without delay; instantly; at once.

Easier -Less hard or difficult as compared to something else. Requiring less labor or effort than something else.

Eat Crow - To be forced to admit to having made a mistake, as by retracting an emphatic statement; suffer humiliation.

Warm - Having a sensation of bodily heat. Having or giving out a moderate degree of heat, as perceived by the senses.

Source: Dictionary.com

My Experiences

I’ve learned over the years that when you make a mistake, you should admit it as early as possible. Furthermore, you haven’t really made amends for your mistake until you’ve apologized DIRECTLY to the one(s) who were harmed by the mistake.

A Recent Example

Just 2 days ago I was having a telephone conference regarding a prospective matter on which I’m working. During the conversation, I grew a little frustrated and I was probably a little short with the other person. I feel like the point I was trying to make through my frustration was justified, but perhaps the way I handled it could have been better.

After thinking about it for a few hours, I sent them an email telling them that I had been having a bad day (which was true) and I realize that I was probably a little rude during our conversation. I apologized, right then and there.

A few hours later I got an email back from the other person where they said I shouldn’t worry about it and that I was right and that we should just move on with the project and get it done.

An Observation About My Example

I felt like the point I was trying to make was valid. The other person also admitted in their responding email that my point was valid. The thing that was NOT valid was the way I initially handled it. I let my frustration get the best of me and it affected my behavior.

The point is that it does NOT matter that I was right. That was not nearly as relevant as the fact that the way I handled the situation was not the best and that it could have been better.

What Does The Quote Suggest?

The quote suggests that as soon as you come to the realization that you messed up or that you behaved badly, you should admit it PROMPTLY. The sooner you admit that you were wrong, the sooner you begin to mend the damage that was caused by your mistake.

It also suggests that the quicker you do it, the easier it is to take back your words (eat crow).

The Point

To me, the main point is that YOU make the admission of your wrong doing BEFORE circumstances force you to do so.

For example, because I was a little rude during my phone conversation of the other day, I could have permanently jeopardized the business relationship I am attempting to build with the other party to the conversation. If I would NOT have apologized, it is possible the other person might have decided to not do business with me and circumstances would have forced me to admit (at least to myself), that I had made a mistake.

By realizing and then admitting I made the mistake, I apologized and corrected the situation BEFORE circumstances forced me to realize there had been a problem.

The 2 Phases Of Apologizing

The first step is realizing you messed up. If you remain unconscious to the fact you were in error, you will never put yourself in a position to correct the problem AND you will likely repeat the problem in the future because you never learned from your first mistake.

The second step is actually taking action and admitting (to all necessary parties) that you made a mistake.

Today’s Video

Today’s video is not about apologies, but it is an example of the value of having enthusiastic mentors in your life. In this video, Dr. John Blangero of the Southwest Foundation for Biomedical Research talks about that very subject.

Dr. John Blangero is one of the persons who will be featured in my upcoming book:

If you want to view that portion of the interview, click on the image below.