Stanley F. Bronstein – Personal Development BlogPersonal Development Blog of the Founder of the Achievement IQ Movement and Creator of the Laws of Positioning

Law #45

Position Yourself To Be Happy

The reason people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be. (Marcel Pagnol)

Some Definitions

Reason – A basis or cause, as for some belief, action, fact, event, etc..

People – Persons indefinitely or collectively; persons in general. The entire body of persons who constitute a community, tribe, nation, or other group by virtue of a common culture, history, religion, or the like.

Find – To discover or perceive after consideration. To ascertain by study or calculation. To become aware of, or discover.

Hard – Difficult to do or accomplish.

Happy – Delighted, pleased, or glad, as over a particular thing. Characterized by or indicative of pleasure, contentment, or joy.

Always – Every time; on every occasion; without exception. All the time; continuously; uninterruptedly.

See – To perceive (things) mentally; discern; understand. To construct a mental image of; visualize.

Past – Of, having existed in, or having occurred during a time previous to the present; bygone. The time gone by.

Better – Of superior quality or excellence. Of superior suitability, advisability, desirability, acceptableness, etc.; preferable.

Present – Being, existing, or occurring at this time or now; current. At this time; at hand; immediate.

Worse – Bad or ill in a greater or higher degree; inferior in excellence, quality, or character. More unfavorable or injurious.

Future – Time that is to be or come hereafter. Something that will exist or happen in time to come.

Less – To a smaller extent, amount, or degree. Lower in consideration, rank, or importance.

Resolved – Firm in purpose or intent; determined. To come to a definite or earnest decision about; determine (to do something). To clear away or dispel (doubts, fears, etc.); answer.

Source: Dictionary.com

Examining The Past

I don’t know what it is, but it seems to be a very common “feeling” that the past is often better than the present or the future.

No matter how old you are, just think of your childhood. I believe the reason you remember it to be so good is because you were happy then.

Think about it. Children (under normal circumstances) are almost always happy. Why are they happy? Because I believe happiness is the normal human condition. We are born to be happy and one of the reason we were happy when we were young is because we didn’t know any better. We were happy because we were free.

It is only when we become older that things begin to happen in our lives that cause us to move away from that natural state of happiness. You don’t get the job you want, so you’re unhappy. You don’t get to buy as nice of a car as you want, so you’re unhappy. You don’t get to go out with the person you want, so you’re unhappy.

REMEMBER – THE NATURAL HUMAN CONDITION IS ONE OF HAPPINESS. WHEN WE WERE YOUNGER, WE FOUND IT EASY TO BE NATURALLY HAPPPY. THAT IS THE STATE WE NEED TO RE-CREATE IN THE PRESENT AND THE FUTURE.

Examining The Present

Today is a gift, that’s why they call it the present. (Eleanor Roosevelt)

I don’t know what it is, but it seems to be an all too common trait for all of us to complain every day. It’s too hot; it’s too cold. That food isn’t any good; that person was mean to me. Whatever.

We have a tendency to see each and every day as being worse than it actually is. While writing this article, I happened to see a segment on ESPN about a young boy who has terminal lung cancer, but still managed to play baseball. He was content, he was happy, all just because he got a hit during his one time at bat.

That boy has a lot more problems than I do (or most of us for that matter). His health is in jeopardy. He is probably not going to live much longer, YET HE WAS HAPPY! He didn’t focus on the past being better. He didn’t focus on how bad his present was. He didn’t focus on his probable lack of a future. He just focused on the moment and how happy he was that he got a hit during his one time at bat.

IN SHORT, HE SAW THE PRESENT FOR WHAT IT ACTUALLY WAS – A GIFT. HE DIDN”T COMPLAIN ABOUT IT. HE DIDN”T SEE IT FOR SOMETHING WORSE THAN IT ACTUALLY WAS. HE FOCUSED ON THE GOOD IN THE PRESENT.

Examining The Future

The only way to predict the future is to visualize it in advance.  That is where resolution comes in.  Resolution is a funny word, as it has multiple meanings.  It can mean firm in purpose / determination.  It can also mean seeing clearly.  The higher the resolution, the more clearly you see something.

I believe that the firmer we are in “seeing” our purpose and the more determined we are in achieving it, the more clearly we will see our future.

The more clearly we see our future, the more likely it is to come to pass.

So, if you want to be happy, IN THE FUTURE, you need to see clearly, IN ADVANCE, what it is that will make you happy.

IN SHORT, YOU NEED TO SEE THE FUTURE FOR WHAT YOU WANT IT TO BE.  DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANT YOUR FUTURE TO LOOK LIKE, OR ARE YOU SIMPLY WAITING FOR IT TO COME TO YOU.  UNLESS YOU SEE IT IN ADVANCE, AND WORK TOWARDS IT, YOU MAY NOT BE HAPPY WITH THE WAY IT TURNS OUT.

Conclusion

Examine your past.  Embrace it.  Realize what it was that made you happy (and unhappy) then and use that knowledge for enjoying the present and shaping the future.

Enjoy your present.  Embrace it.  Let go and look for the good in every day.  Remember that every day is a gift.  It has been given to you and you should be thankful for it.  Enjoy it as best as you can.

Shape your future.  Visualize it.  See it.  Create it.  The best way to predict your future is to create it.

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